Friday, December 13, 2013

You Asked... { Dealing with two babies }

Dealing with two babies

After giving birth I found myself asking so many question for every day to day situation, and it was hard to find answers with doctors, they are not always available, so I started asking those questions to other moms, and trust me sometimes they know better than doctors, because in some situations those things are not written in a book.  So I decided to create this Q&A session where real moms can give their advice and support. I would love to see all you mamas out there sharing the love. And if you have any question that you would like to see it featured and answered here please send me an e-mail to

Q&A: Dealing with two babies?

Baby #2 is on the way! How will I manage to split my attention between two small children?


Caring for one baby can certainly be a full-time job, but don't worry -- two kids doesn't necessarily mean double the work. Remember, your children will give each other attention too, even lifting a bit of the load from you at times. Let your older tot "help out" with the new baby (holding the diaper at changing time, helping with feedings), and they'll both get to be the center of attention.
Lots of repeat moms worry that they won't love the second child as much, or be able to offer as much attention, but fears are usually short-lived. Each baby is a totally different person, and will find their own special spot in the family.
More concerned with logistics? Invest in a good double stroller, interview babysitters, and work out a plan with your partner. Need more advice? Check out this tip from fellow user, goodhartedmommy:
"Get a really good sling or carrier. That way you can tend to both at the same time. Really, it's just second nature. You can read all the tips in the world, but once you're in the situation, it will come right to you naturally and you'll do great!"
> Have a good tip? Leave a comment below!

I have to say, the first few weeks of dealing with two were very difficult. DS at 2.5 yo really wanted to get a reaction from DD (newborn) and the only way he learned to do that was to make her cry. It took two months of coaching to get him to be gentle enough for me to have them in the same room. And my first few weeks of screaming "No!" and giving timeouts every time he hurt her did nothing to help him; he liked the reaction. Consistent praise for gentle touches and "big brother presents" after a good week were key.Now that DD is 5 months old, things are much easier. I can leave them alone in a room together while I go to the bathroom. I can put DD in a sling and go adventuring with my son- she loves to watch him doing swimming lessons or jumping around at the park; he can really make her smile.

I struggle everyday dealing with 2, but I think I have finally found my rhythm! My 2 DD are exactly 54 weeks apart. So when my youngest was a newborn, my oldest was just learning to walk and becoming more independent. But at the same time she was more demanding of my attention because she is SO active! So dividing my attention and giving my youngest the attention she deserved(s) is sometimes very difficult. I try to give each of them some special Mommy time each day...even if it's just 15 minutes alone. It took me almost 1 year to get in a groove with the 2 of them!Now they are 2 and just about 1 and finally play together, eat together, and are really becoming sisters! It's so much fun to watch & experience. I sometimes wonder though if twins would be easier! ha ha ha!! At least they are on the same pace!!

Having had 2 newborns while juggling an 18 month old potty training toddler, I can truthfully say "Been there, done that!" The experience was grueling, DEFINITELY, but as a post-partum doula, I am thankful that I know all the tips and tricks so that I can help my mommas of twins who are struggling the same way I was! 2 best tips? #1- Try to nurse the babies together during the day (tandem nursing) but try to stagger their night feedings so that you can doze off while snuggling with just 1 baby, and then switch I found that nursing both girls at the same time took too much attention and I wasn't able to get any rest during their feedings! And #2- Wear the babies in a baby carrier!!! 1 Moby wrap will do the trick for 2 babies, or for more hands free options, how about a Beco Butterfly II ?? wearing your babies will give you a few minutes to get SOMETHING done other than gaze at your new precious bundles, and it will give them the chance to be close to you instead of being left in the crib or car seat!

Dealing with two babies is sometimes difficult but the amazing feeling that you have when you see them makes you forget about all the difficulties. I have twins and they are very cute. It is very difficult for me to take care of them as I am studying for a special education teacher certificationbut I am trying to divide my time in order to do both things. When they are sleeping I am studying and doing the household work. Also I am lucky that I have a great husband who is helping me to take care of them.

My two babies aren't far apart! I honestly have no idea, I guess reading a lot of books for advice! My second baby was a surprise to the both of us! But I will always try to give them the same amount of attention.

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